The Bell Curve

City Paper’s weekly gauge of Philly’s Quality of Life.

Councilman DiCicco passes lie-detector test, supporting claim that Councilman Mariano made anti-Irish slur. Mariano issues statement in which he misspells "dago" and "midget." Plus 3

School Reform Commission announces formation of task force on classroom discipline. Promptly reports, on advice of bullies’ task force, that there’s no problem, ma’am, we’re just talkin’. Plus 3

Increase in cases at Criminal Justice Center causing delays of up to an hour just to get through metal detectors. Proposal to allow weapons gaining support. Minus 2

Most members of Council disagree with Mayor Street’s plans to end small annual cuts in wage tax. Us, too — we were counting on that $3.27. Plus 5

Political watchdog group questions whether small N.J. company hired to deliver city voting machines on Election Day can handle job. How many do you need, company president asks, when only, like, a third of the people vote anyway? Minus 1

Phillies open training camp. Scott Rolen craps all over everything. Plus 2

Comcast vows to stop collecting Web-surfing info on its high-speed Internet customers. CN8 host Lynne Doyle promises to start collecting info from guests "any day now." Plus 1

Philly has highest rate of death sentences among nation’s largest cities, according to new report. Championship-starved local sports fans gather outside D.A.’s office to chant, "We’re No. 1!" Minus 7

Catholic school students can earn extra credit for taking part in anti-abortion rallies, Inquirer reports. Wow, just imagine what they must get for getting pregnant. Minus 3

Seventy-six couples get married or renew vows at ceremony during halftime of Sixers game on Valentine’s Day. Everyone else boos. Plus 1

Total pluses: 19

Total minuses: 13

Score for the week: 6

Last week’s score: -9