Also this issue: Icepack -A.D. Amorosi

September 26-October 2, 2002

naked city

Buffy Lives

RE-BUFFED: Thanks to cross-marketing, a pixilated version of the slayer will attempt to penetrate the Buffy fan base digitally.

Video doesn't kill this TV star.

by Debra Auspitz

Buffy The Vampire Slayer
Electronic Arts/Fox Interactive
Rated T
MSRP 49.95

Ah, merchandising. Mel Brooks’ wise old Yogurt in Spaceballs had it right when he pointed out that the secret to success is to take a popular product and beat it to death with branded offspring. Unfortunately, a lot of attempts to translate TV shows and movies into video game format end up being cookie cutter action games, a template marked with “insert popular character here.”

If any current pop culture phenomenon inspires a drooling fan base, it's Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Joss Whedon's absolutely brilliant ode to the grotesque underworld that is adolescence and young adulthood, now in its seventh season. I'm guessing the "absolutely brilliant" part gives away my status as a diehard devotee to the show, or, you might say, as a wannabe Scooby (or, you might say, as a big nerd).

So it was with some trepidation that I tried out the new Buffy the Vampire Slayer game (Xbox, $49.99). If, as I suspected, the game was pretty much Lara Croft with a stake and a dye job, then I would be seriously disappointed. Lucky for me, this game is pretty damn good. All of the major characters -- Willow, Giles, Xander, Angel, Cordelia and (sigh) Spike -- are voiced by the actors who play them, except Ms. Buffy herself -- guess Sarah Michelle Gellar was too busy with her Prinze Charming. The graphics are excellent, though the characters each have little quirks that make them seem less realistic. Willow has a slightly blueish hue to her face, and her boobs are huge. So are Buffy's. I guess no matter how true to the show the game tries to be, there are certain inalienable laws in the video game universe (Thou shalt have copious cleavage and the ability to store and carry numerous weapons while wearing tight pants with no pockets). Giles has gross teeth, which Anthony Stewart Head certainly does not have, and Xander looks like he lost about 1,000 pounds. Close up, Buffy has a definite SMG vibe, but every once in a while she looks more like Kristy Swanson.

A couple of quirks provide some laughs -- walk too close to a torch on a wall and Buff pulls a Michael Jackson and runs around with her head on fire. Doesn't seem to hurt her, though. The characters have cutesy, Buffy-esque dialogue, though a lot of it falls flat. (Who came up with "why are we at the ass end of nowhere?")

As far as story goes, Spike and his pals attack the Bronze (Sunnydale's most popular and, it seems, only nightclub) and kidnap Willow. You, as Buffy, must track her down and save her, in the process discovering Spike's dastardly plans, which involve human sacrifice and the resurrection of the Master, the über-vamp who terrorized Buffy in season one.

The game itself can be played on three levels of difficulty, and "easy" gave me a run for my money. You and Buffy fight your way through several locations used in the show (and re-created realistically in the game), including Sunnydale High (the one destroyed at the end of season three, when the game takes place), the graveyard and Angel's mansion. The hardest part is getting used to the idea of Spike being evil again, after he's been making kissyface with Buffy for a season.

I tested Buffy the Vampire Slayer out on two friends, who had little to no experience with the show and both were, er, sucked in. The game offers a helpful history of the slayer provided by bad-teeth Giles. In between levels you meet the gang at the library to chat, and the dialogue there is a nice combination of exposition and in-jokes.

The levels are mazelike and confusing -- once you kill all of the vampires, demons and zombies who come at you, you can still be stuck trying to figure out what the heck you are supposed to do next -- find a key, push on a hidden door, fall to your death off a cliff (well, I did that last one so many times it felt like it was part of the game). It's a one-player game (though Internet cheats will show you how to open up four hidden multi-player arenas), but our troika was entertained into the wee hours of the night (with one person at the controls and the other two screaming contradictory directions). Our heroine's fighting moves are so cool that it's hard not to get cocky and find yourself yelling out "you want a piece of me?" to the various baddies crossing her path. Watch out, though, Buffy's death scream is pretty awful.

Buffy is a great example of cross-marketing an established character while managing to create an enthralling game. It may not be quite as exciting as "Spaceballs: The Flamethrower," but the kids will still love it.