icepack

by A.D. Amorosi

"Bring a new child’s toy, get a special price/ See adult toys we know you’ll find quite nice/ Santa will be here in all his style and grace/ And ready for all you naughty girls to sit upon his face!" With that creepy ad from Club Kama Sutra’s Toys for Tots party, I say "fah who for-aze" (whatever Whos sing while getting Grinch’d) to Christmas. Better yet, welcome to the holiday hedonist who’d rather buy blow and hang in a VIP lounge sipping triple malt Scotch than buy his family presents, or to the shaky-handed meal planner ordering out due to a hangover. It’s to that party die-hard that I present Premiere Sports -- the agents behind Heather Mitts (not literally) -- and their "Naughty or Nice" jamboree, Dec. 24, that takes over the 32°/Cuba Libre complex. Or Paperstreet's C-Eve "Red Ball" at Red Sky where DJ Scott Melker spins (he's just back from The Netherlands, where he filled in for Raekwon of Wu-Tang Clan and was mistaken, by the audience, for an actual Wu).… The bunker is down and the garage door up on Pontiac, Daryl Madden's rework-in-progress of the former J.C. Dobbs spot on South Street, starring promotions by Clark Maloney (Rock Lobster), second-floor music booking by Dave Levine (the Attic) and a first-floor menu planned by David Heydt.… With liquor license in hand (a feat that had proved impossible for the building's previous occupant, David Cohen's 312 Market), Patrice Rames of Bistro St. Tropez opens his 250-seat Patou at 312 Market St. in mid-January. Rames leased the building from Cohen, and Patou's designer, Vincent Smith-Durham, makes a splash with a theatrical vestibule and wide-open kitchen.… Denying nasty rumors, Rick Henry, GM at Neil Stein's Bleu, assured me there'd been no shake-up in management or lease-renewal problems for the new year. "There's no shift in staff. I believe we have renewed, as far as I know, for 2004."… "Before there were half a dozen clubs along Rittenhouse Row, we were pioneers," laughs David Carroll of his Bar Noir and its upcoming fourth-anniversary party on Dec. 29, featuring an early performance of Jesse Wilson's one-man show, Sex Hero (and yours truly spinning). Hanging at Nicole Cashman's b-day soiree at 32°, Carroll promised that Noir has plenty of weird tricks up its sleeve. P.S.: That's how good Cashman's party was -- the notoriously non-east-of-Broad-traveling Carroll was there with others, like the freshly "punk-rock" tattooed Eric Weiss, who just got a gig as Comcast national's art director, and fashion-forward photog Nic D'Amico, who not only signed for a second season with NFL Films, but whose video/light design jawn, Klip//Collective (with Ricky Rivera), opened the raucous melee that was Crobar in N.Y.C. last week.… Congrats to Tommy Conwell, who won WYSP FM's post-Stern 10 a.m. on-air slot. The area six-string slinger, who hosted WYSP's Loud & Local, faced competition from a not-so-young rumbler, the Eagles' John Welbourn.… Julia Othmer is currently working on an introspective new outlook for her next CD, to be produced with Edan Cohen at Soundgun and co-starring Mike Brenner and Mark Schreiber. The latter duo is also busy planning next week's New Year's Eve Low Road reunion at Tin Angel.… If you rent the Dumb and Dumberer DVD, hit "main menu," go to "all access pass," then go to "lost and found," then the "dumb" section and watch the "alternate main titles" to see Philly actor Scott Martin Brooks, who recently appeared in Hack and will be seen in 2004's Mr. 3000 with Bernie Mac. "I'm the hospital orderly in baby Harry's birth scene," says Brooks. "You can't miss me, unless you blink really slow."… When The Roots unveil their Okayplayer group grope at E-Factory with Pete Rock and Jean Grae, Dec. 29 and 30, watch for Black Thought's new protégé, Mack Dub, an 18-year-old Philly rapper being taught the art of the live show.… Peter Santa Maria can't get enough Iggy Pop. After snagging Pop's Khyber set list, his Jukebox Zeros covered Ig's "Kill City" when opening for Mudhoney at The North Star last Friday.… Along with spinning Soul Food Tuesdays at Players (613 S. Second St.) and making a spectacle of himself in Nike's Street Baller MTV series (dial it up on Comcast On Demand), designer K. Vaughn has spent the last few weeks in clubland with artist collective The Traveling Wares, showing off his new scarves of polar fleece, velvets and fake fur. So as you read this, if you need a last-minute swanky gift, e-mail him at kvaughn2000@hotmail.com.… When Octavio brought electroclasher Larry Tee to Shampoo for his Vesago party's eighth anniversary on Dec. 20, the invite read "The Last Vesago." Is it true that Octavio, who does eves in N.Y.C., is throwing in the electro-towel? "Well, it technically it is the last of the year," he says coyly. "We'll see. The Octo-machine never tires."

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