May 27-June 2, 2004

the bell curve

City Paper's weekly gauge of Philly's Quality of Life

This week's Bell Curve is dedicated to a certain sleepy SEPTA electrician. We've been there, man.

Philadelphia's School Reform Commission comes up with "Declaration of Education," 18 goals to achieve by 2008. That's way more goals than the "Learnstitution" and the "Magna Smarter" combined!
Plus 4

Police Department's $52 million radio system mysteriously fails for 20 to 40 minutes. Larry Mendte blames it on the cicadas.
Minus 3

M. Night Shyamalan supposedly brings stars of The Village back to shoot a new ending. Apparently now the super twist at the end will be followed by another twist that cancels out the first twist and makes the ending really quite conventional. Or something.
Plus 1

Olney High students protest poor conditions and education. They ask friends from Masterman to help with the signs.
Plus 3

Bill Cosby gives 90-second commencement speech at Temple graduation. The first half was just slurping sounds as he ate a delicious pudding pop.
Minus 2

Philly Police Department and Parking Authority come up with a plan to reduce gridlock. That's like asking City Council to come up with a plan to reduce cronyism.
Plus 1

After two years, Hack is canceled. David Morse asks if he can hang on to the cab.
Minus 4

Howard Dean comes to town to stump for Joe Hoeffel. Hundreds injured.
Plus 1

Total pluses: 10

Total minuses: 9

This week's total: 1

Last week's total: 4.5

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