icepack

by A.D. Amorosi

Not everything is sexy. Take P. Diddy's Citizen Change registration onslaught. He wants voting to be as sexy as "Biggie records and Sean John shirts," he told press in Manhattan. But, despite the act naughtily hidden behind curtains in cramped spaces, voting, occurring at old VFW halls that smell like hot dogs in still water, and especially this year, is not sexy. You can't do something sexy when the boys are either too stupid (Bush) or too cartoonishly monsterlike (Frankenberry Kerry). No one wants to work that hard for even the sweatiest screw. Also not sexy were these whispers in my ear: "Women for Hoeffel: Susan Werner & Jennifer Weiner." That's what it said on my Joe Hoeffel benefit invitation. Oy. It's no Geena Lee Nolin bite-your-cock, call-me-daddy sex video. But. The final nail in the squeeze box: After Club Kama Sutra's July of "Bare as You Dare" Karaoke and Bi-Island Girl Luaus (ads say "island girls just want to get lei'd"), come Aug. 1, CKS will no longer provide free parking validations for the garage at 11th and South. Damn it — stuck on 10th and Lombard with a boner and can't get free parking! … Bad rock moves: While sashaying to her mic for Yeah Yeah Yeahs' Y100 gig at Penn's Landing, fashion-no-sta Karen O — still working that tired, just-fucked Pat Benatar look — fell flat on her ass. O couldn't have felt too bad. Her opener, punkish Trouble Everyday frontman Kyle Costill, fumbled with his Ray-Bans as if juggling ball-bearings. … What's this I hear about Tribecca taking its private-club thing underground with live rock and a supposed SM-esque change in decor? And soon? … The best new label in Philly, Daniel Piotrowski's jazz-bo High Two, flies Kevin Diehl's bop-Cubano Sonic Liberation Front higher with Ashé A Go-Go and a party at Tritone, July 31, co-starring Tom Spiker and G. Calvin Weston. (More on p. 35.) … Don't know where he's going (Chicago?) but fave spinner Ralph "Major Taylor" Darden (Jai Alai Savant, Franklin) ended his Silk City reign (Let's Get Butt Naked and Fuck), maybe soon his time in Philly. Speaking of gone DJs, Randall Jones moved back to Houston. "I just bought a house and a brand-new studio for the price I paid in the Northeast on rent," says he who DJs throughout Mexico and South America. … Morgan's Cabaret at the Prince Music Theater finally lets one of Philly's own play: Eddie Bruce, July 29-Aug. 1. … This may sound stiff, but it's funky as all get out: Young Friends of Rittenhouse Row, Temple Alumni Network and Philly Renaissance Project start a weekly hip-hop and house party, H.Y.P.E. (Hot Young People Exclusively), Sundays at Tragos. … Glam, Old City's wild disco (hello, DJ Robbie Tronco!) gets an eclectic rock-samba-hop Wednesday happy hour with me, DJ A.D. Speaking of City Paper people: Sean O'Neal plays under the nom d'electro Someone Else at Fluid Aug. 5 to celebrate the first release on his new label Foundsounds. … WHOWHATWHERE: Ex-Phillies Bob Boone and Greg Luzinski supped at Pompeii — a place that does not serve the Bull's Polish sausage. Bloodhound Gang-er Jimmy Pop toasted Viva La Bam Margera in the balcony during the Gang's TLA gig. Look for Bam producer Joe Frantz (currently getting a deal for Kiss a Dead Man's Ass, the sequel to the Haggard) to film the next Bloodhound video. Whenever that happens. Now that TLA's Gay-Les Film Fest is over, it's time to restock the bar. Artistic award recipient Alan Cumming happily drank between stops at the Patel-Barber house, his Arts Bank Q&A — where Adam Ant fan-club president Robert Drake had risque questions for Ant-fan Cumming — and The Barrymore Room. We can also look at footage shot of Needles Jones doing his Joan Rivers impersonation during opening-night ceremonies (TLA Video should put that on DVD) at the Prince. While Jones cheerfully roasted PGLFF comers, Ben Edwards, Lady Dutchess Tami, Psydde Delicious, Ricky K-Tell and his Dumpsta Players, Scott Johnston and the Hard Liquor crew they share will roast and humiliate singing-waitress Needles at his b-day bitch-fest at Bar Noir Aug. 2. … The Philly Soul Collective's deep housed-up Booty on the Barge finally happens July 30 as b-day jam for doorman Evan Lee — 10 p.m. sharp from 401 N. Delaware Ave. … Mobbed: Is producer/actor Leo Rossi (Analyze This) being made, I mean, asked to shoot, uh, film his 10th & Wolf in Pittsburgh with Val Kilmer in the lead? Yes, since that's where the big money is coming from. With The Sopranos off for two years, is The Roots' young protege Li'l Mack getting a shot at an HBO gangster series? Is producer/director Sal Mazzotta (whose flick The Father, The Son gets renamed Mafioso on DVD) working on a comedy for USA Networks? Stay tuned or else. … Now that he's done a first gig of his Walkie Talkies reunion with Peter "V.I.P." Seprish, Rahfee Barber goes solo with his blip-hop Newspaper on Aug. 2 at Tritone, opening for Jody Hamilton and Alicia McCarthy's Rifle Nice. … Back-to-the-b-days: happies to Bernie Resnick's partner, literally and figuratively, Sally

Mattison, Esq., to Maja studio producer Pete Rydberg and Ms.

Maria Tessa Sciarrino of Plain Parade.

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