September 2- 8, 2004

the bell curve

The Bell Curve

City Paper's weekly gauge of Philly's Quality of Life

Nader is ruled ineligible to be on the ballot in Pennsylvania. Aw.
Plus 2

Many cabbies go on one-day strike to lobby for a rate increase. Hate to have been taking minutes at that strike meeting.
Minus 4

Philly opens public military academy. All we're doing is teaching the violent ones how to outflank us.
Even

Going into its second football season, the Linc still suffers from traffic problems. As in Todd Pinkston still can't catch a pass in traffic.
Minus 5

Cast of Apprentice 2 includes three Wharton grads. Promises to be driest, stiffest, most bad-dancingest reality show ever.
Plus 3

Citing bronchitis, Ozzy doesn't perform at Ozzfest's Philly tour stop. Fuckin' choker.
Minus 6

No one is hurt when two piers in collapse in South Philly. Oops, spoke too soon — 1,500 Teamsters just filed workers' comp claims for lower-back pain.
Minus 2

WPEN changes its format from old standards and big band to oldies. Apparently their old audience died out. We give their new one five years.
Even

Peco announces plan to cut natural gas prices for Philly customers. Wawa unveils plan to cut the cheese prices at its deli counter.
Plus 1

Daily News' Riot Grrrl columnist calls protest in New York "hippie fabulous." Bikini Kill rolls over in its grave.
Minus 2

North Philly is experiencing a rebirth says Daily News. Which makes Fishtown, what, the afterbirth?
Plus 2

Total pluses: 8
Total minuses: 19
This week's total: -11
Last week's total: 7