January 20-26, 2005

wtf

Profanity Fair

by Duane Swierczynski

I hate it when columnists fill space with a lame "letters from our readers" thing. It's like a SEPTA driver saying, "Screw it — you guys take the wheel."

But last week I asked for your thoughts on profanity in the City Paper, so I'd be a jerk not to share, right? Interestingly, many people who wrote in were pro- profanity. In moderation.

"I have no problem with profanity when appropriate," e-mails Tom Watkins . "But I have felt, as apparently others have, that often some of your writers have used it gratuitously. It almost seems at times that they are acting like naughty children trying to get attention."

Tom, when our writers want attention, they usually piss on the carpet. But good point. Profanity is an easy way to trigger a reaction. In that way, writers are like children; when they want to emphasize something, they'll reach for the handiest tool in the box — a good old-fashioned "fuck." Maybe it's too handy.

Andrew Kevorkian thinks so: "No doubt, you were expecting at least one letter like this in response to your invitation for people to comment on the use of obscenities. I am against it. If nothing else, it shows a lack of a good vocabulary and shows a distorted sense of "being with it' and having "street cred.'"

Meanwhile, Alice Krupit writes: "I think the surprise element of cursing in unexpected places/situations or when the circumstance richly deserves it is entirely appropriate. However, when expletives pop up in practically every other sentence, it's not funny, surprising, or appreciated; rather, it makes the writer sound lame or stupid."

Agree with you there, Alice — and funny, it reminds me of something my great-aunt Margaret, the daft cunt, once said.

(Hey, don't look at me that way. It's all cute and funny when somebody in a Guy Ritchie movie says it.)

David Jones suggests a compromise: "I believe that profanity can be implied if the writer feels it needs to be included. If you simply put the first letter, people will get the point."

Do you mean use dashes in place of offensive letters? Plenty of other publications do it, but I've never liked the practice. How many dashes is enough? "Shith---" could mean "shithole" or "shithead," but if you give it the extra letter (shitho--), it sounds like a new Stephen Starr sushi joint. Confusing.

Finally, there's Paddy Dougherty's approach: "I don't see anything wrong with cursing. It's free fucking speech. Writing is an art and if a writer chooses to use profanity in their art, then that's their choice. If you don't like it, then don't read it. It's just fucking words anyway."

Now tell me: How could I dare insert dashes into something as beautiful as that?