The Bell Curve

City Paper's weekly gauge of Philly's Quality of Life

Center City porn shop Doc Johnson's will be replaced with condos. They'll be fitted with coin-op window shades.
Minus 2

International tourism in Philly is on the rise. Confused foreigners return home thinking it's an American custom to ride in boat cars and quack at pedestrians.
Plus 4

The $10 million "Once Upon a Nation" project begins, stationing historic re-enactors in the city. For that kind of money, we better see the cobblestones running with fresh British blood.
Minus 2

Rock Lobster nightclub damaged by winds. Next on God's hit list: The Love Shack and Rome (if He wants to).
Minus 1

State loans $18 million to Navy Yard for new streets, sidewalks and sewers. For $18 million, those streets better be paved with fresh British skulls.
Even

Poll shows that six out of 10 Philadelphians don't trust city government. Margin of error: 40 percent.
Minus 6

Janitorial school opens in Philly. Won't that be stepping on Temple Ambler's turf?
Plus 2

The Phantoms are playing in the Calder Cup finals, the AHL equivalent of the Stanley Cup. Game to be played on a rink of frozen tears.
Plus 3

President Bush invites the investigators from the Delimar Vera case to the White House. They're expected to show up in about seven years.
Even

Total Pluses: 9
Total Minuses: -11
This Week's Total: -2
Last Week's Total: -4

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