November 24-December 1, 2005
the bell curve
The Bell CurveCity Paper's weekly gauge of Philly's Quality of Life
Camden named the nation's most dangerous city for the second consecutive year. Commonplace rioting and looting erupts into victory parade.
Minus 4
The FBI uses secret surveillance photos to determine who is using the Port Authority's eight Eagles tickets. For the last several weeks: nobody.
Minus 1
Kenny Gamble's construction company is way behind schedule on building high-end homes in Southwest Philly. "The problem can be summed up in five words," says Gamble. "Money, money, money, money
MONEY!!"
Minus 1
Philly's heroin trade is booming. Take that, Camden.
Minus 4
CBS 3 secretly taped sex acts at Club Kama Sutra and showed them to L&I. At first L&I was like, "Yeah, isn't this place awesome? Wanna see the tapes we got?" but then they saw the giant stick up CBS 3's ass and was all, "Um, yeah, we should probably do something about this secret sex club you've found. Good work. Great scoop, guys."
Minus 3
L&I shuts the club down due to fire and electrical code violations. "Our hands were tied," says L&I. "It was kind of hot."
Even
PA Health Inspection office issued 4,000 license renewals to restaurants outside the Philly area without actually inspecting them. Channel 3 would have been all over this, but they were too busy getting fitted for chastity belts.
Minus 3
A month after the death of David Cohen, Anna Verna says she will shut down his office and lay off his staff. Next week she'll set li'l Ricky Mariano's oompa-loompas free.
Even
Total pluses: 0
Total minuses: 16
This week's total: -16
Last week's total: 5
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