500 Number of light years that separate Earth from a brown dwarf discovered in the Chamaeleon constellation by a team of scientists led by Penn State's Dr. Kevin Luhman, who, along with his colleagues, believes the failed star could lead to the smallest known solar system. To observe the star, the scientists used a highly powerful telescope fashioned from the lenses of Joe Paterno's glasses.

80 Percentage of Philadelphians, according to a recent poll conducted by the Greater Philadelphia Chamber of Commerce, who support the proposed bill to cut the city's Business Privilege Tax, which will be voted on by council in December.

$42.95 Monthly fee that I now pay for Comcast high-speed Internet after seeing my six-month $19.99 honeymoon come to a bitter end. That's it, from now I'm going through a competitor for my cable Internet hookup! (Reality: It's Comcaustic!)

9 Number of homeless activists arrested Dec. 8, 2000, for a two-day sit-in protest at City Council chambers. If only those pessimists had anticipated that in five years, Mayor Street would propose a plan to end homelessness in 10 years, at which time he would actually be eight years removed from office, and thus unaccountable for any specific or full failures of the plan. You can check my math, but I'm pretty sure that means homelessness is gone already.

2 Rank of Philly club 32° in the national Top 100 Nightclubs and Bars for 2006 as selected by the editors of Nightclub & Bar Magazine. Although, to be completely straight with you, the top 100 were ranked alphabetically—numbers before letters. But hey, we're No. 2!