The Eagles will give Drew Rosenhaus the chance to arrange a trade for T.O. Rosenhaus unveils new assistant: David Copperfield.
Plus 2

A Northeast man who hosts a conspiracy-themed pirate radio talk show from his basement is fined $10,000 by the FCC. Hey, on the bright side, somebody was listening in. On the downside, you were right: It was the feds.
Minus 4

Rocky Balboa begins filming in town, with the first shoot taking place at Laurel Hill Cemetery. Yo Adrian, say hi to Mick, Apollo and my dignity for me.
Plus 2

Rendell's chief of staff repeats threat to PATCO, saying, "We don't need to keep subsidizing a money-losing rail line." "Not that there's anything wrong with that," he whispers to Faye Moore.
Minus 5

The Philadelphia Stock Exchange will close its trading floor and move to a fully electronic system. "We confess," says exchange head. "The whole operation has been running on E*Trade since like '03."
Even

Bill Cosby signed a deal with the National Enquirer which permitted him to edit a story regarding his sex abuse scandal. Enquirer leaks details of the deal after being paid in Monopoly money, most of which went immediately toward renting back their own building, from which Cosby had removed all furniture and clothing in order to teach an important life lesson.
Minus 4

Tax-reform advocacy group Philadelphia Forward posts a link that lets you e-mail Mayor Street's BlackBerry on its site, prompting at least 100 messages. "OK, OK, I've seen the goddamned Narnia SNL rap already!" says Street.
Plus 5

CEO of Philly-based insurance company CIGNA is given the Marco Polo Award by China. Shenanigans! He totally had his eyes open.
Plus 3

Total pluses: 12
Total minuses: 13
This week's total: -1
Last week's total: 7