Q: I am a 44-year-old male, married with children. I have been interested in being on the receiving end of anal sex with a woman. I guess it comes from hearing how a male has his own g-spot, and it's located in the anus. My wife will not think of doing this because she says it would diminish her respect for me [and that] she is the one that is supposed to be taken. In my eyes, it's just a different way of being intimate with each other.

Mom: Yes, indeed, a man has his own g-spot and it is called the prostate gland. When inserting a finger into the anus, the prostate can be reached by curving the finger slightly toward the front of his body. It is walnut-shaped and best responds to light circular massaging in a "come hither" fashion. For many men, this can be extremely exciting and it is a shame your wife feels she does not want to share this most intimate pleasure with you. Talking openly with her, expressing your desires and perhaps encouraging her to start out slowly may change her attitude.

Pop: You should do it yourself for a while until you get her interest level up. Use lots of KY. If she sees that it pleases you, she should be more interested in helping. Frankly, I think she needs to grow up and be an equal partner. A woman should take as well as be taken.

Q: As an avid reader of your column, I have to say I enjoyed reading the one on fisting, but you left me hanging—did you get fisted? I would love to see a pic of you! Also, I am trying to get a third woman to join my GF and myself—any ideas?

Mom: I doubt very highly if my daughter got fisted. As for pictures—don't hold your breath. I worry enough about her being stalked by some loony tune without her face being published, thank you very much. As for a third party, go where others are looking for the same thing. SwingLifeStyle.com, for starters.

Pop: How about a fist up your nose?

Q: My girlfriend and I have been together six years and love each other very much. We're great explorers of sex and love to try new things, including threesomes, role play, toys, sex in public, sex on planes, fetish clubs… you name it, we've done it. So, after all this time, I'm thinking of proposing. I've got the ring—I just need to figure out a memorable way to do it. Ideally, I want to do it in bed, or in some kind of sexual situation—since that's been so much a part of who we are as a couple. I worry though that this may upset her, especially when she has to explain to people (like her parents and sister) how I asked her to marry me. So what's a guy to do?

Mom: You have already decided upon reflection that if you propose to her in some sexually meaningful way, she may be upset. Please propose to her in a socially acceptable way where she will be proud to let friends and relatives know the circumstances. Save the "sexually special" occasion for just the two of you. (P.S. I sure hope you have more going for you than just sex.)

Pop: Take the ring and put it up your ass, then let her eat it out as a surprise. You don't have to tell anybody and neither does she.

Questions? Comments? Why don't you come up sometime and see me? E-mail ashlea.halpern@citypaper.net. No phone calls.