Well, not hundreds anyway.

If you prefer your boardwalk hauntingly quiet, head for the gutted pastel buildings and dilapidated arcades of this now-dead vacation spot. Stay at the Berkeley Carteret Oceanfront Hotel and Conference Center ($65-$295 a night), once owned by Johnny Cash, but remodeled with floral prints in the 1980s. "People say the hotel reminds them of The Shining," says hotel clerk Sinneh Rose.

Grab beers and grub (mozz sticks, monster wings, etc.) across the park at the Wonder Bar, where Asbury native Bruce Springsteen has been spotted, or head inland for dinner at Red Fusion and pick from a vast menu of pasta and seafood. There's a DJ on Saturday night and surf movies every Wednesday. Afterward, be sure to stroll the art and antiques stores that line Cookman Avenue.

Berkeley Carteret Oceanfront Hotel and Conference Center, 1401 Ocean Ave., 732-776-6700; Wonder Bar, Fifth St. and Ocean Ave., 732-502-8886; Red Fusion, 660 Cookman Ave., 732-775-1008

The picturesque opposite of empty Asbury Park, Point Pleasant is precisely that: pleasant, with sandy beaches, absurdly blue water and a decent-size boardwalk.

Stay at the oldie-goodie Driftwood Motel ($182-$255 a night), which is relatively clean and has a pool and snack bar. Spring break leftovers be warned: Rowdy guests need not apply. "We turn down the prom kids," says motel employee Neil Smith.

Should rain hit, spend the day at Jenkinson's Aquarium gawking at baby seals, American alligators and other kinds of aquatic life you should never find at the Jersey shore.

Driftwood Motel, 1414 Ocean Ave., 732-892-3519; Jenkinson's Aquarium, 300 Ocean Ave., 732-899-1212

Drive over the bridge to Long Beach Island and you're smack in the middle of what some New Yorkers consider paradise.

When in Ship Bottom, book a few nights at the beachside Drifting Sands Oceanfront Motel ($160-$300 a night), where some rooms have private balconies that directly overlook the beach.

For a perk-me-up, pop into How You Brewin? Internet cafe and coffee shop. "If you go to the other towns, it's all gourmet," says barista Ashley Kark.

Want to save green? Kark recommends heading to the beach near the 7-Eleven at Eighth Street and Long Beach Boulevard, where the beach patrol doesn't check for beach tags.

When dinner rolls around, look no further than How You Brewin' neighbor Voodoo Steakhouse, whose menu includes tempting options such as black peppercorn carpaccio ($13) and grouper with mango and sun-dried cherry chutney ($32).

Ship Bottom gives you the LBI name without the chaos. But if you insist on buying one of those annoying LBI oval bumper stickers, we never knew you.

Drifting Sands Oceanfront Motel, 119 E. Ninth St., 609-494-1123; How You Brewin?, 2020 Long Beach Blvd., 609-494-2003; Voodoo Steakhouse, 20th St. and Long Beach Blvd., 609-494-4777