The goons on Cribs say the bedroom is "where the magic happens," but we know many boudoir occurrences are far from tantric. Case in point: the busted guy/girl you apparently brought home last night, who's now sitting in your kitchen, eating Crispix and drinking your last Diet Squirt. Bastard! The only thing we can really do is make the shit plush 'n' classy, and keep the adjoining bathroom stocked with plenty of products to scrub away lingering guilt.

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Hunter green dragon corset (Anais), $365, at Delicious Corsets, Liberties Walk, 1040 N. American St., #901, 215-413-0375, www.deliciousboutique.com

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HiP Shocking Shadow Pigment in Rebel (L'Oréal), $11.99, available at area drugstores

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Hairspray, styling lotion and shine spray set (Bumble & Bumble), $55, at Plain Jane Boutique, 128 E. Gay St., West Chester, 610-918-0230, www.plainjaneboutique.com

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Stitched pillow (Bo Concept), $63, at Bo Concept, 1719 Chestnut St., 215-564-5656, www.boconcept.us Patterned pillow (Andrew Morgan), $149, at Host, 7946 Germantown Ave., 215-967-1196, www.hostinteriors.com; blue dalmation beaded necklace ($91) and circular beaded necklace ($31), hand-strung by Deborah Porter, at Village Earth Bead Market, 8442 Germantown Ave., 215-248-1317, www.villageearthbeadmarket.com

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Chocolate shower gel ($8) and powdered milk bath ($12, Philadelphia Soap Company)At Duross & Langel, 1218 Locust St., 215-735-7075

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Tea light holder (Bo Concept), $7, at Bo Concept, 1719 Chestnut St., 215-564-5656, www.boconcept.us

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Organic olive oil soap in tea tree, patchouli and North Shore (Savon), $8 each, at JuJu, 716 S. Fourth St., 215-238-6080, www.jujusalon.com

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Cedar sage organic body polish (Trillium), $24, at JuJu Salon, 716 S. Fourth St., 215-238-6080, www.jujusalon.com

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Handblown perfume bottles (Glass Act), $18 each, at Black Cat, 3428 Sansom St., 215-386-6664, www.blackcatshop.com

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Chocolate-scented bar soaps (Philadelphia Soap Company), $6 each, at Duross & Langel, 1218 Locust St., 215-735-7075

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Shimmer and Shine Box featuring lip shine in Double Bubble, glitter in Rose Petals and lip color in Peaches & Cream (Tinte Cosmetics), $35, at Plain Jane, 128 E. Gay St., West Chester, 610-918-0230, www.plainjaneboutique.com

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Blood orange and vanilla soy candle (John Masters Organics), $38, at JuJu Salon, 716 S. Fourth St., 215-238-6080, www.jujusalon.com
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