The Bell Curve

City Paper's Quality-o-Life-o-Meter

Donovan McNabb tears right ACL in Sunday's game versus Titans, will miss eight to 12 months. "Our season is over," says Andy Reid. "Without a passing game, there are no other ways — and we've done studies on this — to move a football." Minus 5

Chaka Fattah officially declares intentions to enter 2007 mayoral race. Shocka. Even

Street eyes Fattah's congressional seat as a possible post-mayoral goal. "I'd offer a trade," says Street, "but I kinda promised Milton he could be mayor next." Even

Fox 29 reporter Nick Smith terminated and escorted out of station following "a loud, closed-door meeting with management." The meeting was in the bathroom. Sometimes those Fox guys take the ambush interviewing thing a little too far. Plus 1

Phillies first baseman Ryan Howard is named NL MVP. Plus 10

PGW lowers natural gas costs by around 5 percent, but raises "base rate" on customers' bills by approximately 10 percent. "Now I'm off to the zoo," says PGW's Tom Knudsen. "I'm going to cut the legs off all the giraffes and teach them to use stilts." Minus 1

Rocky Balboa to debut Dec. 18 at the Prince Music Theater. And the after-party at the Adidas Store will double as a DVD-release shindig. Very cool. Even

Video of a police officer using his squad car to street race turns up on YouTube. Too bad you got pwned by that Corolla, son. (But nice Bella Vista drift.) Minus 2

FBI agents photograph union leader John Dougherty's house in connection with an unpublicized investigation. "Oh, no, he's not in trouble," say feds. "We just dig his wainscoting." Minus 1

Total Pluses: 11
Total Minuses: 9
This Week's Total: 2
Last Week's Total: -4