ISSUE .
November 30th, 2006 other issues :
On The RoadPoet Samantha Barrow rode cross-country on a mission of mercy. She brought back this diary.
by Samantha BarrowA slam poet who stutters told me after my second feature in Denver, Colo., that he thought the writing workshops I've been doing with survivors of sexual abuse sounded cool but "almost — naw I shouldn't say it..."
Slant:
Class WarfarePhiladelphians want more charter schools. So why won't we open them?
by Tim DanielsPhiladelphia charter public schools are the most successful form of educational reform in the city. So it was puzzling no new charter schools opened this year for the first time in nine years.

Editor's Letter:
Poetry and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance by Duane SwierczynskiWhen A&E editor Patrick Rapa approached me about a cover story that would involve poems, a motorcycle, erotica and cheap diners, I had one thought: I've been working everyone way too hard.

Loose Canon:
Scrooge ReduxWhere did all this gifting come from, anyway?
by Bruce SchimmelWell, kids, the spirit of the season has slid over me like a greasy fog. Bah, humbug. It's time for my annual holiday rage against against the consumer machine.
Feedback:
Letters to the EditorJump, jive and rail
Love Ain't in the Air: What I hate is when a real weekly whines and complains like the other lame weekly. Please keep it real.
What's in a Frame?Comcast lets you "lean back" and turn your TV screen into an art canvas. Should museums be worried or thankful?
by Juliet FletcherIt's late, you've had a skinful, and la belle ferronière is eyeing you up.
Running NumbersA scholarly look at the digits that matter.
by Nick NorlenPicks of destiny: Six degrees of Philly-related media personalities.
Fine Print:
Into the LightLocal Wikipeople meet up in the real world.
by Mary ArmstrongSure, facts are slippery, as anyone who does research will tell you.

IcepackAmorosi on the news, nightlife, gossip and bitchiness beats.
by A.D. AmorosiIn this week of wonk, how is it that Black Friday's story of a Miami El Nuevo Herald cartoonist trying to take staff members hostage didn't make bigger news?
Line of DefenseA union campaign targets a big behind-the-scenes political contributor.
by Doron TaussigA crowd of security guards stands beneath the green awning of the United Check Cashing store at Third and Market streets. They've been here for over an hour, waiting for their paychecks. "I'm getting ready to quit," one declares.

Political Notebook:
The Bride Wore JeansRenee Gilinger gets hitched; the candidates go to the Pennsylvania Society weekend
by Mary F. PatelBig news for Liberty PA state director Renee Gilinger: She got hitched last week to live-in boyfriend Michael Marsico. The couple tied the knot Thanksgiving Eve.

The Bell CurveCity Paper's Quality-o-Life-o-Meter
When news breaks in Philadelphia, we make jokes.

Art:
The Insider?An exclusive interview with the PMA's unlikely new interior decorator, architectural daredevil Frank Gehry.
by Steve CohenFrank Gehry has been awarded the redesign job at the Philadelphia Museum of Art, but don't expect his signature curvaceous structures and reflective metal.
Culture Shock:
Art Review:
Luck of the DrawMark Lombardi's works on paper are scandalous. Yet the little jolts of pleasure they provide are quite unscandalous.
by Robin RiceMark Lombardi's complex flowcharts document dancelike movements in the covert international exchange of money and influence.
First Friday FocusLori Hill's First Friday hit list.
by Lori HillPAFA's annual print sale, Projects Gallery's "Little Secrets," Fleisher's Nativity, and a plethora of holiday shows.
Theater Review:
Snowed UnderA new Christmas show succeeds with satire.
by Mark CoftaEvery Christmas Story Ever Told borrows the format the Reduced Shakespeare Company uses on the Bard to assemble pastiches of ... well, the title says it all.
Arts Picks:
This Is the Week That IsCapital-themed comedy dating back to the days of Aristophanes.
by Deni KasrelSome things will never change. This comes across clearly in 1812 Productions' This Is the Week That Is: Political Humor for the Holidays.
FêteThe best part of the holiday season is to be found at Locks Gallery's group show "Fête." Sort of.
by Rachel FrankfordThe installation seems like a multilayered examination of a party, moving from functional objects to commentaries on society through objects to existential anxieties.
Joan SaltzmanIs Mr. Right and My Left Kidney too gruesome for Hollywood?
by Patrick RapaPart of you wants to say Joan Saltzman's new memoir about finally finding true love after years of searching is a prime candidate for a movie adaptation.


Last Chance:
Catch It or Regret ItAsian Arts Initiative, Martha Armstrong, Our Lady of 121st Street
by Rachel Frankford
Arts Agenda Picks:
Just Do ItChoosical!
by Dayna VickeryIf improv comedy and musical theater had a love child, it'd surely be Choosical!, Freefall Productions' full-length show that played to sold-out houses last winter.
In The Event That...You Want a Whole Mess of Art History in One Shot
by Megan M. ErwinCerealart's "25 X 25" brings together 25 works from just as many artists, spanning the history of the seminal White Columns gallery.
Just Do ItNew Frontiers in Cartooning and Graphic Novels
by Rachel FrankfordSo female cartoonists are less marginalized than they used to be—semi-sweet victory. Give a half-hearted cheer.
On The DLNutcracker: Men in Tights
by Will DeanSome questions only sound strange when you ask them out loud. For example: What would the sugar plum fairies look like with facial hair?
GalleriesGalleries are usually open Tuesdays through Saturdays; please call the gallery for exact days and hours. Receptions are denoted with Reception 3RD STREET GALLERY, 58
Museums/ExhibitsMuseums and exhibits have varying schedules; please call for exact days, hours and prices. ACADEMY OF NATURAL SCIENCES, 19th St. & the Parkway, 215-299-1000. BUTTERFLIES!
Performing ArtsPlease call the phone number listed with the venue for specific dates, times and ticket information. dance 4:48 PSYCHOSIS Sarah Kane wrote a play right
Readings/Book SigningsANDREW KIRSHNER The physician and author signs and reads from his new couples-healing book, "Back Together." Wed, Dec. 6, 7pm, FREE, Barnes & Noble, 1805
Missing in ActionPlaying DVD catch up with movies that never made it here.
by Sam AdamsIt's that time of year again. No, not Christmas; that weird week when the onslaught of holiday blockbusters and awards contenders ceases in the long shadow of Thanksgiving blockbusters.
Born AgainAlthough she's at its center, Mary is rarely The Nativity Story's star.
by Cindy FuchsOnce upon a time, the Christmas story was news, startling and even daunting, especially to a teenager named Mary.
Destiny UnknownJack Black and co. ponder Tenacious D's big screen gamble.
by Patrick Rapa"Did we make a rated R movie for kids? So that no one would see it?" Jack Black's got the look of somebody having a lite epiphany.
Screen Picks:
Robert Altman, 1925-2006ong past the age when many directors have lost the ability to get films made, Altman kept plugging away.
by Sam AdamsIt's hard for me to imagine there will never be another Altman movie.
ShowtimesAMC Orleans 8 , 2247 Bleigh St., 215-722-4262. The Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause (G) fri: 1:20, 4:30, 7:30, 9:45; sat: 10:30, 1:10, 4:30,
Repertory FilmSend repertory film listings to tami.fertig@citypaper.net. AFRICAN AMERICAN MUSEUM OF PHILADELPHIA 701 Arch St., 215-574-0380, www.scribe.org. Ethnic Journeys Scribe Video Center screens two short docs
On the GoGoGirlsMusicFest finds a stage in Philly.
by M.J. FineOne night, 10 performers, 20-minute sets. It sounds like the classic setup for a battle of the bands. But this is no competition.
Here as I AmFrank Stefanko's new photo anthology is pretty in Patti.
by M.J. FinePatti Smith makes an unlikely muse. She's not pretty by most standards; hardly anyone would call her cute. She's scrawny, with straggly salt-and-pepper hair and sharp features. She's all angle and no curve.
NamecheckWhy it's not really goodbye for local favorites Mazarin.
by Brian HowardStoltzfus: We thought about changing the name to something similar — Mazarin Jr., QS Mazarin — and then we decided that the name was cursed.
Hang The DJ:
Sudden RushJ. Edward Keyes on Shuffle
by J. Edward KeyesDefying tradition and fucking with the timetable of year-end list-making, nearly every hip-hop artist worth caring about has waited until the dwindling minutes of '06 to rush out an album.
One Track Mind:
Denison Witmer"How to Be Alone"
by M.J. FineHe's insecure. She's independent. He keeps splitting town. She drinks with strangers and comes home to read in a too-roomy bed.
Music Picks:
Bowerbird @ LandmarksFri., Dec. 1, 8 p.m.
by Shaun BradyIt's been noted a few times in these pages how Dustin Hurt's Bowerbird concert series has provided a dizzying amount of exposure for experimental
Victor WootenThu., Nov. 30, 9 p.m.
by Mary ArmstrongEver since Victor Wooten became an instant sensation for his complex yet effortlessly executed melodies in the Flecktones, bass players have been wondering if he didn't have extra fingers.
Rock Camp for GirlsSat., Dec. 2, 8 p.m.
by Kelly WhiterWe've got the Baird Sisters and the XX chromosomes from Golden Ball, but where will Philly's next generation of girls who rock come from?
The Prism QuartetSat., Dec. 2, 8 p.m.
by Peter BurwasserThe saxophone has become the iconic jazz instrument, but that was certainly not the intention of Adolphe Sax when he invented it.
Allen Toussainthu., Nov. 30, 6 and 9 p.m.
by Sam AdamsAlthough he's released few albums in his four-decade career, Allen Toussaint has done as much to spread the sound of New Orleans as anyone.
On Golden PondChef Abde Dahrouch makes waves in Radnor.
by Maxine KeyserSometimes, the word "pond" conjures up thoughts of dark, amorphous creatures, bottom dwellers and the like, but no such images come to mind when you you eat at Pond.
Small Bites:
Brooklyn to Queen: A Neighborhood StoryBefore Red Hook Coffee & Tea even fired up its espresso machine, the neighborhood was talking.
by Lori HillSituated on desolate-after-sunset Fabric Row, Red Hook fills a void for Queen Villagers.
Feeding FrenzyRestaurants opening, closing and pending
by Drew LazorNOW SEATING Angelina's Italian Restaurant, Franco's High Note Cafe, Frog at the Yard
What's Cooking:
Small BitesThe Week In Eats
by Amy StraussDinner with Dornenberg, Putting It All Together, Vodka and Latke Bash, Noche de Tequila, Cooking for Couples
Top 5:
Breakfast SandwichesMorning Glory
by Jessica Loughery1) Sourdough Breakfast Sandwich, Brasserie Perrier; 2) Breakfast Super Melt Sandwich, Philly Diner; 3) Western Sandwich, Mrs. K's Koffee Shop; 4) Pepper and Egg, Tony Luke's; 5) Whitefish Salad on a Bagel, Trolley Car Diner
Watering Hole:
Byrne's TavernIt's Where We Drink
by Will DeanBreezing down I-95 South toward the city, you can see the jagged outline of Center City skyscrapers, the murky water of the Delaware and a three-story-tall shamrock.

Agenda Lead:
Deck The MallsKOP vs. Springfield vs. The Gallery Death Match
by Rachel FrankfordLike any prudent agoraphobe, I try to wait out the period between Thanksgiving and New Year's Day much the way one might wait out an air raid.
Agenda Picks:
Kids, etc.Big Fun for Little Ones
by Jessica LougheryEllis Island; My Home Planet Earth; Children's Rock 'n' Roll Brunch; The BFG (Big Friendly Giant); Peace Around the World Celebration
Just Do ItThe Lesbians of Laughter Tour
by Natalie Hope McDonaldSat., Dec. 2, 8 p.m.
On The DLPlaid Pony Vintage Holiday Open House
by Kelly WhiteSat.-Sun., Dec. 2-3, 11 a.m.-7 p.m., free,
Justify Your ExistenceSustainability Salon: Unplug the Christmas Machine
"No matter what kind of tradition you're celebrating this season, you should try to do it simply."
In The Event That...You Always Root for the Little Guy
by Megan M. ErwinThe Welterweight Wars Thu., Nov. 30, 8 p.m.
Accidental TouristScott Turow
by Amanda McKennaWed., Dec. 6, 6:30 to 8 p.m.


Paper Doll:
Strange BedfellowsYour pocket guide to eccentric bedroom behaviors
by Ashlea Halpern"Does nothing weird you out?" I get this question so often, I'm starting to think I'm either: a) seriously deviant, b) too understanding, or c) friends with the wrong people.