The Bell Curve

City Paper's Quality-o-Life-o-Meter

Chase for playoff spot ups Phillies attendance 15 percent. That's bc he's hott :P. Plus 3

Neighborhood groups in Fishtown and Northern Liberties refuse to meet with SugarHouse casino to discuss "community benefits agreement." You go, girls. What better way to stick it to Richie McRicherson than refusing a handout for doing absolutely nothing? Psst, hey Sugarhouse, wanna build anything at 123 Chestnut? We're all hands over here. Plus 2

Mayor Street, who recently kicked off aggressive tax-collecting initiative, found to owe nearly $5,000 in back property taxes. "Would you believe me if I told you Ron White was in charge of that?" asked Street. "How about Corey Kemp?" Minus 8

Study suggests that expanded Convention Center may have trouble staying competitive. "FEEEEED MEEE?" pleads Convention Center. Minus 1

Greater Philadelphia Cultural Alliance study finds that arts organizations bring around 40,000 jobs and $1.3 billion to region. Unfortunately, the study, which was compiled by 40,000 researchers, cost $1.3 billion. Plus 1

Rookie quarterback Kevin Kolb gets sacked twice, fumbles in three minutes of playing time. Ha ha, honky QB. Minus 1

Norristown residents instructed to boil drinking water after "problem at local pumping station." Norristown: Now our poo water's piping hot! Plus number 2

Star witness Christopher "Slam" Quattrocchi testifies in Breed Outlaw Motorcycle Club drug trafficking case. "Duuh, duuh, duuh. Duuh, duuh, duuh," says Quattrocchi. "Let the boys be boys!" Even

Eagles blow out Lions, 56-21. Fans stay up all night trying to bleed yellow and blue. Plus 2

Total Pluses: 10

Total Minuses: 10

This Week's Total: 0

Last Week's Total: -6