Ultimate Summer Fun Guide: May/June

Something awesome to do each and every day of the summer.

Catch the biggest and oldest multibreed horse competition in the country — this is the 110th anniversary — at the Devon Horse Show. Figure out what the heck Green Conformation Hunters and Six Year Old Young Jumpers are. Added bonus: rich people in jodhpurs and the Budweiser ponies. Maybe there's free beer. Through June 1, $3-$50, Devon Show Grounds, thedevonhorseshow.org. —CV

Go buy a Seger Playground court membership for $25 and join Seger Park Tennis Club. Whether you're interested in playing in competitive brackets, taking lessons or just batting the ball around, Seger's got a great community of tennis lovers. Meet new friends; stay in shape. 10th and Lombard streets, segerparktennis.com. —CV

Before your woman got the power, Rick DiFonzo had it. First as guitarist/songwriter for the A's — the toast of Philly's bar-band psych-pop sound in the late '70s/early '80s — then playing on the Berlin Wall for Roger Waters, then playing with the likes of Jagger and Dylan. The television-jingle writer is dropping his first two solo records this year: Bright Shiny Pop and InstruMENTAL. Say hello. 9 p.m., $12, North Star Bar, 2639 Poplar St., northstarbar.com. —ADA

Remember Rocks for Jocks? Me neither. Take a refresher at beautiful 230-acre Lorimer Park in Montgomery County. Added bonus: Geology for Anyone isn't graded. It's not even pass/fail! Woo! Wander around the great outdoors and figure out what those sedimentary, igneous and metamorphic rocks are. 2 p.m., free, 183 Moredon Road, Huntingdon Valley, 215-234-8497, parks.montcopa.org/parks. —CV

Things start looking up when Maguire Air Force Base presents Air Force Week with free family activities throughout the region, including Air Exposition with the U.S. Air Force Thunderbirds and special days at the Phillies and Philadelphia Zoo. Airmen and women will share their stories at each event, and demonstrate their high-flying skills. You can bring the kids, but it'll probably go right over their heads. Through June 2, airforceweekinphiladelphia.com. —NHM

Noisy one-and-done open mics just ain't fair to the struggling singer-songwriters trying to work out their sound. That's why I like Open Milk Nights at Milkboy Coffee with host Scot Sax. Each artist does two songs and paying customers are encouraged to shut up and listen. Milkboy Coffee, 2 E. Lancaster Ave., Ardmore, 610-645-5269, milkboycoffee.com. —MA

Nothing is more satisfying than a crisp salad full of home-grown veggies. Each summer my city garden produces tomatoes, cucumbers, carrots, peppers and wonderful, wonderful lettuce. Alas, down in Pennsport we don't have the luxury of those enviable Powelton Village and Chestnut Hill yards, and my husband cringes at the number of pots that clutter his path. But then we enjoy that first all-natural, labor-of-love salad and all's well. Your thumb's not that green, you say? No worries — check out the Horticultural Society's City Gardening Series: Growing Fruits and Vegetables in Containers. 6:30 p.m., free, Free Library, South Philadelphia Branch, 1700 S. Broad St., 215-988-8872, pennsylvaniahorticulturalsociety.org. —CV

Bardo Pond, the makers of Philly's droney-est, drug-referenciest songs, have been expanding consciousnesses and elevating the stakes of feedback ambience since 1991 (with occasional breaks to detune). In March they released the six-track odds-and-sods LP Batholith (Three Lobed). Only 1,049 copies were pressed, and it's already out of print. Maybe they've stashed some away and will have them available at this performance. Though it's listed as a BP gig, it'll actually feature Alasehir, which is what BP's Michael and John Gibbons and Jason Kourkounis call their trio incarnation. They'll then team up with openers, Japan's Suishou No Fune, to form the hybrid combo Moon Phantoms. 9 p.m., $8, the Khyber, 56 S. Second St, 215-238-5888, thekhyber.com. —BH

You might think that the growing legitimacy of comic books, science fiction and tentpole superhero movies would take the kitsch out of this year's Wizard World Convention, but with a special-guest undercard featuring Lou Ferrigno and the Iron Sheik supporting Battlestar Galactica's Katee Sackhoff, rest assured the local news stations will still line up for giggly human-interest shots of fanboy costumes. Through June 1, $25, Pennsylvania Convention Center, 1101 Arch St., wizardworld.com. —JB

Once reserved for grandmas and their lady friends, bingo has, in recent years, morphed from fogey to fabulous with the help of AIDS Fund Philly and its themed — this evening is Twisted Toga — charity game nights. A tip: Avoid chafing by wearing a layer in between your toga and your O-69. 6 p.m., $20, Gershman Y, 401 S. Broad St., 215-731-9255, aidsfundphilly.org. —CH

Your dreams of watching a giant can of noodle soup drop a flying elbow on Robox, the environmentally friendly cardboard robot, come true at Kaiju Big Battel at the Troc. The monster mayhem will be punctuated by performances by Harry and the Potters, so let's hope Voldemort shows up to bring our favorite monster hero, Club Sandwich, back from the dead. Doors at 3 p.m., show at 4 p.m. $19.50, Trocadero, 1003 Arch St., 215-922-LIVE, kaiju.com. —DM

For three decades or so, the good people of the Bothy Club have been hosting open mics at various local watering holes, patterned after acoustic folk clubs of the U.K. The Mermaid Inn — is it high atop Mount Airy or at the foot of Chestnut Hill? — has been a pretty steady home for this singer-songer support activity. 9 p.m., Mermaid Inn, 7673 Winston Road, 215-247-9797, themermaidinn.net. —MA

Flip-flops, 45-minute renditions of "Grey Street" and watery margaritas in Camden: If you get it, you get it. Join us on the lawn to welcome summer at the first night of Dave Matthews Band's two-day jam. 7 p.m., $40-$75, Susquehanna Bank Center, 1 Harbour Blvd., Camden, N.J., ticketmaster.com. —MW

Grab a cocktail and meet tomorrow's Arthur Millers at Write On! A Philadelphia Young Playwrights' Celebration. Years from now, when you're hanging out at the Arden, you can tell your friends all about how you knew the young scribes "before their postmodern western comedy revival period." 6-8:30 p.m., $125, World Café Live, 3025 Walnut St., 215-222-1400, phillyyoungplaywrights.org. —DM

Get a lucky strike with Northeast Philadelphia's Gay Bowling League at Thunderbird Lanes. You don't need to know your splits from your spares; bowling pros and wannabes are welcome. Teams of three or four will take to the lanes weekly ($15 for games and shoe rental). Players are welcome to bring their own booze and food. Contact Bob at bobs153@cs.com, or Blaze at 267-574-6102 or allamericandad@aol.com. Thunderbird Lanes, 5830 Castor Ave. —NHM

The gala ambassador's reception to kick off the Odunde Festival weekend is still top secret — not even the time nor place have yet been revealed. But it is a reliably classy event, so check the Web site for breaking news. Of course the big street festival, all day Sunday, June 8 (at 23rd and South), is a good time, too. odundeinc.org. —MA

These days the Legendary Roots Crew is living extra extra large, as evidenced by the superstar showcase ?uest and co. have lined up for The Roots Picnic: Gnarls Barkley, Sharon Jones, Diplo, The Cool Kids and Santogold (plus Deerhoof, for ballast). The concert of the summer. 2 p.m., $49.50, Festival Pier, Columbus Boulevard and Spring Garden Street, okayplayer.com. —PR

Cheer on your favorite drag queens and leather daddies when Philly Pride presents the 2008 LGBT Pride Parade and Festival. Dykes on Bikes will ceremoniously lead the parade from the Gayborhood to Penn's Landing where the merriment continues with food, booze, live entertainment (including a performance by Betty) and all the free condoms a boy could want. Also look for Chumley & Carlota's Wizard of Oz Sing-Along. Noon, 13th and Locust through the Gayborhood to Penn's Landing, 215-875-9288, phillypride.org. —NHM

Celebrate some very old glory during The Betsy Ross House's annual Flag Festival (June 8-15). Visitors can check out rarely seen historic flags, as well as demos by local arts and craftspeople during a weeklong street fair. Expect to also see: tourists playing old-fashioned carnival games, Philly's favorite Ben Franklin impersonator Ralph Archbold, and a slew of guys in Revolutionary-era uniforms. 239 Arch St., 215-686-1252, betsyrosshouse.org. —NHM

We can has furry companion!?!1! June is the ASPCA's Adopt-a-Shelter-Cat Month, so really, it's your civic duty to swing by the Pennsylvania SPCA's Philly headquarters (350 E. Erie Ave., 215-426-6300), and welcome a shelter cat into your home. Off you go. aspca.org. —CH

Fashion show! Celebrity-signed handbags! Michael Nutter! Cocktails! One of these things is not like the others, but listening to our new mayor auction off goods to support the Career Wardrobe as part of its seventh annual A Perfect Fit: Fashioning Futures for Women charity event is reason enough to attend. 5:30-8:30 p.m., $60, World Café Live, 3025 Walnut St., 215-568-6693, careerwardrobe.org. —CH

9:43 a.m. On a Thursday. Philadelphia, Pa. It's as good a time as any to stake out the streets of our titular city to stalk the gang of It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia as they shoot on location for Season 4, which is slated to begin production this June. Just don't do anything they wouldn't do. —NN

If marriage is an institution, are married couples institutionalized? (Rimshot.) Find out in the new musical comedy Married Alive! at Ambler's Act II Playhouse. June 13-July 6, Act II Playhouse, 56 E. Butler Ave., Ambler, 215-654-0200, act2.org. —MC

Did you watch John Adams and think "needs more dog"? Of course you did. Take the family to The Adventures of a Boy and His Dog in ye Olde Philadelphia (through June 15) wherein Mum Puppettheatre's favorite fabric pals struggle for freedom against a British bulldog, with the help of Betsy Ross' cat and a French poodle. True story. 2 and 4 p.m., $15, Mum Puppettheatre, 115 Arch St., 215-925-7686, mumpuppet.org. —AMS

The Lehigh Valley Iron Pigs, the Phillies' brand-new Triple-A affiliate, are horrible. Their record, at this writing, is 11 wins and 33 losses. Putrid. But their stadium, the shiny new Coca-Cola Park just off Route 22, is pretty sweet, and front row-ish seats are still easily had. Tonight the oinkers give away that most ridiculous of ballpark freebies, coveted by college douchebags near and far, the bucket hat. ironpigsbaseball.com. —BH

Don't bother reading James Joyce's Ulysses today. That'd be silly, see, because a bunch of local celebrities are chronicling Leopold Bloom's long walk through Dublin anyway for Bloomsday. As always, the Rosenbach will provide tons of supplementary materials, including artist Robert Berry's comic strip adaptation of the book, on display through June. After the reading, lug your 800-pager to McGillin's Olde Ale House (1310 Drury St.) for a free beer. Noon-7 p.m., free, Rosenbach Museum & Library, 2008-2010 Delancey Place, 215-732-1600, rosenbach.org. —TF

Todd Kimmell's Lawn Chair Drive-In — everyone's favorite NoLibs screening series of weird and wonderful movies — turns 21 this summer, but it hasn't lost any steam yet. To kick off the season, Kimmell's showing local hero Brian DePalma's Phantom of the Paradise, a bizarre homage to Phantom of the Opera, Faust and The Picture of Dorian Gray, revolving around a character named Beef. Dusk, free, Liberty Lands Park, Third and Poplar streets, lawnchairdrivein.com. —TF

R.E.M. is calling it Accelerate, and everyone else is calling it a return to form. This is a nice chance to see indie rock royalty support their best album in years — a lot of years. Relax on the Mann's lawn on a warm summer night, drinking watery beer and remembering the exact moment when you cracked your Green tape case. 7 p.m., $35-$75, Mann Center for the Performing Arts, 5201 Parkside Ave., 215-893-1999, manncenter.org. —LH

Watch the country's most promising spandexed athletes jump, flip and essentially defy all normal human capabilities at the U.S. Olympic Team Gymnastics Trials. Attend all three days or simply check out the individual events. But leave your replica Olympic torch at home, or somebody will probably jump and tackle you. It happens. Saw it on TV. Through June 22, 3-7 p.m., $60-$500, Wachovia Center, comcasttix.com. —AS

Popped!, Philly's most ambitious indie music festival, kicks off with — holy crap — Slick Rick fronting a live band at the Troc. Sick. On Saturday you've got Mates of State, Vampire Weekend, Mr. Lif, Dan Deacon and more outdoors at Drexel. Sunday is Daniel Johnston with the Capitol Years, Cheers Elephant, The Swimmers, O'Death and such at World Café Live. Poppedphiladelphia.org. —PR

Like a really clean Burning Man, the Kimmel Center's Summer Solstice celebration is a long-hauler —15 hours of day and evening events on the longest day of the year. It kicks off with games, chair massages, classical, jazz, pop and dance performances during the daylight. At night, the sun may be cool but the party's still hot with more music plus speed dating, drag shows and maybe a Guitar Hero competition. Warning: A drum circle is inevitable. Starts 3 p.m., $10, Commonwealth Plaza, Kimmel Center, kimmelcenter.org. —MWB

It's not every day that blond-haired, blue-eyed stud muffins roam the streets of Phoenixville. But today is the Steve McQueen Look-Alike Contest at Colonial Theatre — the first in a series of many BlobFest-related events — so expect scores of them (hopefully on motorcycles). In case a bunch of stinkers show up, though, catch the 2 p.m. screening of The Great Escape for a dose of the real deal. 5 p.m., Colonial Theatre, 227 Bridge St., Phoenixville, 610-917-1228, thecolonialtheatre.com/blobfest. —TF

Ask them: In 1967 your parents were fucking like bunnies to Sergio Mendes and Brazil 66's pop samba sound. That is, unless they were heads and screwing to Moby Grape. Seriously though, Mendes was sexier. Maybe your folks will come to this gig — you'll be there (because you like CSS, which just happens to be Mendes revved-up) and you can get that sick image into your head for the entire show. 7:30 p.m., $50, World Café Live, 3025 Walnut St., worldcafelive.com. —ADA

The Pennsylvania Shakespeare Festival at DeSales University is well worth the hourlong drive up the Northeast Extension. This summer's repertory includes the Bard's Twelfth Night (June 18-July 6, directed by Barrymore Lifetime Achievement winner James J. Christy) and King Lear (July 9-Aug. 3), as well as Cyrano de Bergerac (July 16-Aug. 3) and Jim Helsinger's one-man adaptation of Bram Stoker's Dracula (June 11-29, directed by Philly's own Matt Pfeiffer). PSF, fast becoming a regional leader, also offers a musical Jungle Book for the kids (May 31-Aug. 2). DeSales University, 2755 Station Ave., Center Valley, 610-282-WILL, pashakespeare.org. —MC

So what if Dustin Hoffman and Natalie Portman weren't the magical cinematic pairing we had hoped? The vaguely Willy Wonka-ish Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium has its charms (Jason Bateman!). Besides, if you take a more appreciative audience (likely someone in the 4-10 age bracket) as part of AMC Summer MovieCamp, it'll cost you only a buck and proceeds will benefit Variety: The Children's Charity and the Will Rogers Institute. 10 a.m., $1, Wednesdays from June 25 to Aug. 6, AMC Loews Cherry Hill 24, 2121 Route 38, Cherry Hill, N.J., 856-486-7420. —LH

If you ask me, Times New Viking put out the best album of 2007 (it was called Present the Paisley Reich). It was just an awesome frizzed-out mess, the sound of a hellbent band high on adrenaline. And the new Rip it Off? Bet you'd like it even better. 8 p.m., $10, with Titus Andronicus, Johnny Brenda's, Frankford and Girard avenues, 215-739-9684, johnnybrendas.com. —PR

For instrumentalists who have always wanted to get into Irish jam sessions but didn't know how to take the plunge, what could be better and more supportive than the Tune Learning Circle at the Irish Center (every fourth Friday)? They put the sheet music on the Web ahead of time for the readers, and walk through the tunes nice and slow for those who play it by ear. For $3, you can't beat it. 7 p.m., Irish Center, 6815 Emlen, 215-849-8899, philadelphiaceiligroup.org. —MA

It was funny to see Ringo Starr walk off Regis & (I almost said Kathy Lee) Kelly because they wouldn't give his song its full 4-minute run time. It was a horrible song. But dag — he's Ringo. That's why you'll bother with this 10th All-Starr band show featuring Colin Hay, Billy Squier and Gary Wright. Because dag. 8 p.m., $30.50-$75.50, Trump Taj Mahal Casino Resort Arena, 1000 Boardwalk (At Virginia Avenue), Atlantic City, N.J., ticketmaster.com. —ADA

Is it time for a road trip? As much as the steam of built-on-a-swamp D.C. feels counter-intuitive right now, the 42nd Annual Smithsonian Folklife Festival will keep you so fascinated wandering from tent to tent, you'll forgive the heat. Folk culture goes far beyond music and dance and crafts; NASA is one of this year's themes. The others, Bhutan and Texas, will fill in with the expected. Dancers will be hard to pry away from the conjunto and western/swing promised at the Texas tents. Runs June 25-29, 11 a.m.-5:30 p.m. daily, evening events at 6 p.m., National Mall, Washington, D.C., folklife.si.edu. —MA

You're running out of chances to visit the Center for Emerging Visual Arts exhibit at the Art Museum. Q: Why not go today? A: Because you could go on a Sunday, which is pay-what-you-wish. And we all know what that means. 10 a.m.-5 p.m., 26th Street and Ben Franklin Parkway, 215-763-8100, philamuseum.org. —CH