The Bell Curve

City Paper's Quality-o-Life-o-Meter

A fight breaks out between rival bike gangs the Pagans and the Outlaws at the Philadelphia Tattoo Arts Convention. Says Big Pinkie: "He called my ass-antlers a tramp stamp!" Minus 1

Work begins on the revitalization of Pier 11, as part of the waterfront development plan. Says God: "You keep setting 'em up, I'll keep knocking 'em down." Plus 3

Local consortium, which includes Drexel and Philadelphia Community College, receives $800,000 to provide scholarships for returning veterans. This is good news, and there's nothing funny about it. If only there were some evil university to contrast it to ... Plus 4

The University of Pennsylvania's board of trustees approves a 3.75 percent tuition hike. But only for returning veterans. Minus 2

The Betsy Ross House is featured on an episode of Ghost Hunters. Betsy readies her double-gauge. "The hunter becomes the hunted." Even

The school district holds a series of meetings to explain the "Imagine 2014" program. General consensus: Oh God, we don't want to. Plus 1

In their Chapter 11 bankruptcy filing, the owners of the Inquirer and Daily News claim their creditors recorded confidential meetings. Also, they were mean, and they made Trudy Rubin cry. Minus 1

The Committee of Seventy says City Council is too big. "Tell you what," says Frank DiCicco, "when you become the Committee of 10, we'll talk." Plus 1

Total Pluses: 9

Total Minuses: 4

Total for the week: 5

Last week's total: -1