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ISSUE . June 18th, 2009

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Cover Story

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What Does It Take to Make the NBA?

And does Dionte Christmas have it?

by E. James Beale

Next Thursday is the NBA draft, and Dionte Christmas is on the bubble. Most mock drafts have the high-scoring guard going toward the beginning of the second round. For the past month, he's been flying around the country to tryouts, exhibiting his skills and trying to improve on that. He was hoping his hometown team might take a flier on him. Now, probably, they won't.

Opinion

Loose Canon:

Fair Pay for Fat Cats

Too much is once again too much.

by Bruce Schimmel

Penn President Amy Gutmann's pay package has been rising rapidly for years. Nice work, if you can get it. But in these tough times, the ethics of anyone getting paid that much tends to stimulate some inquiry.

Feedback:

Letters to the Editor

What You Say

"It must have been tough to read my point that American voters can do what they want and my asking bikers to obey traffic laws."

News

Coop d'état

A South Philly street has gone to the birds.

by Isaiah Thompson

The chickens are everywhere — lurking in the tall grasses of the block's vacant lots, clambering over the concrete walls that separate neighbors' yards, seeking out friendly humans with a bite to eat, escorting the chicks, like ducklings, across the road.

Dispatch:

Juvies

"My son's favorite words are, 'I don't care.'"

by Mike Newall

In the last nine months, Philadelphia has lost a police officer, an infant, two small children and a young mother in reckless accidents caused by kids who walked away from the city's juvenile-justice system.

Sidecar Sideshow

Who's right in a neighborhood clash? "The truth is somewhere in the middle."

by Tom Dreisbach

The issue, which concerns just 13 tables and 26 chairs, has transformed into a bitter struggle between neighbors in Graduate Hospital, the primarily residential area surrounding Sidecar Bar & Grille at 22nd and Christian.

School's Out

Neighbors rue the proposed closing of a North Philly high school.

by Shari Dacosta

Last Friday was Spirit Day at North Philly's William Penn High School, and there was an unsettled feeling in the air.

A Million Stories

A different kind of playground | Are CHA's traffic signs illegal? | Photo work ... inspired by SEPTA?

The Bell Curve

City Paper's Quality-o-Life-o-Meter

When news breaks in Philadelphia, we make jokes.

Icepack

Amorosi on the news, nightlife, gossip and bitchiness beats.

by A.D. Amorosi

Now that local goofballs like El Wingador are getting into the ring for Damon Feldman's loopy Celebrity Boxing endeavors, it's getting harder to write about this stuff. Too many tears of laughter and sad disgust.

Arts

Theater Review:

Street Smart

THEATER REVIEW: Avenue X

by Mark Cofta

Philadelphia's champions of small musicals, 11th Hour Theatre Co. apply their considerable talents to Avenue X, the a cappella musical slighted by its "doo-wop" label.

Re-View:

The Vid and the Whale

Robin Rice on Visual Art

by Robin Rice

Four Philadelphia artists who have collaborated with the Fabric Workshop are showing their solo prowess this summer.

Kaleidoscope

Kate Watson-Wallace's CAR | Not Given Lightly | MonkeyBicycle | Elvis Perkins

Arts Picks:

Meredith Rainey: Look Inside

Fri.-Sat., Jun. 19-20, 8 p.m.; Sun., Jun. 21, 3 p.m.; $12, Community Education Center, 3500 Lancaster Ave., 215-387-1911, cecarts.org.

by Lauren F. Friedman

Rainey has not abandoned "ballet-like" movement completely, but Look Inside — an exploration of voyeurism and perception — was heavily shaped by Drozdowski and Cousineau, who encouraged a more generative approach to choreography.

Waxed

Through July 18, Area 919, 919 N. Fifth St., 215-627-3311, area919.com.

by Sherri Hospedales

Abby Schmidt used video stills from an episode on overweight children and their parents to create Hand and Fork, vibrant melted wax pieces that show obese kids stuffing their faces.

Spark Showcase

Fri., June 19, 7 p.m., $20, Plays & Players Theater, 1714 Delancey St., 215-413-7150, theatrealliance.org.

by Mark Cofta

One winner, no losers: That's the fifth annual Spark Showcase, a Theatre Alliance of Greater Philadelphia program promoting small theater companies.

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

Thu., June 18, 7:30 p.m., free, Free Library, Central Branch, 1901 Vine St., 215-567-4341, freelibrary.org.

by Patrick Rapa

This Nigerian-born author thrives on the social, political, historical complexities of the place where she grew up.

Cupcake Bandit Film Fest

~~Sat., June 20, 5 p.m. (films, 8:30 p.m.), free, Jefferson Square Park, 400 Washington Ave., banditfilmfestival.com.~~ RESCHEDULED FOR JULY

by Molly Eichel

The Cupcake Bandit's having an identity crisis: An ineffective villain with a sweet tooth, CB doesn't know if he's chosen the right career path.

Movies

Food, Inc.

City Paper Grade: B

by Cindy Fuchs

The movie presents an array of complaints, and also calls viewers to action.

It's Showtime

Can the Philadelphia Film Market make this city a true film town?

by Molly Eichel

Essentially a trade show for filmmakers to show off their wares, PFM lets directors and screenwriters rent booths and screening time to pitch their work to potential distributors and producers.

Repertory Film

Your weekly guide to local film events, festivals and under-the-radar screenings.

Send repertory film listings to molly.eichel@citypaper.net.

Music

Shooting Gallery

Why Punk Rock Payroll's albums don't look like albums.

by John Vettese

Punk Rock Payroll's first offerings were the 2006 hardbound books of story-songers The Extraordinaires. Since then, the label took a page from Flipper in releasing a 7-inch single that unfolded into a board game, and has now progressed into raygun territory.

Hang The DJ:

Rank Amateurs

Nobunny's Love Visions, Japandroids' Post-Nothing, The Beets' Spit in the Face of People Who Don't Want to Be Cool

by J. Edward Keyes

Nobunny's debut, Love Visions, is a starter course in rank amateurism. Meanwhile, the guitars on The Beets' Spit in the Face of People Who Don't Want to Be Cool are thin as filament.

Music Picks:

Anthony Hamilton

Tue., June 23, 8 p.m., $39.50-$65, with Musiq Soulchild and Chrisette Michele, Tower Theatre, 69th and Ludlow streets, Upper Darby, ticketmaster.com.

by Deesha Dyer

Are you a man who messed up with your lady? This is the chance to make it right.

AlasNoAxis

Wed., June 24, 8 p.m., $12, Philadelphia Art Alliance, 251 S. 18th St., arsnovaworkshop.com.

by Shaun Brady

Jim Black is without question one of the most inventive drummers in modern jazz, as evidenced by his work in bands like Human Feel and Bloodcount.

Bee Eater Showcase

Wed., June 24, 9 p.m., $5, with Ethel Cee, Hustle Simmons, Fel Sweetenberg, DJ Akshun, Keziah, Leah Nicole, Hezekiah, U City, Reef the Lost Cauze, DJ Ultraviolet, hosted by Mars Five, Silk City, 435 Spring Garden St., beeeaterrecords.com.

by Deesha Dyer

Waiting around has never been DJ Ultraviolet's thing.

Popped/2nd St. Festival

Sat., June 20, 11 a.m.-8 p.m., free, 600-1100 blocks of North Second Street, poppedphiladelphia.org.

by Patrick Rapa

Last summer it was the Battle of the Indie Rock Superish-stars. This time, Popped — partnered with 2nd St. Festival — is a casual stroll through Northern Liberties.

Patrick Wolf

Sat., June 20, 7 p.m., $17-$20, with Living Things, Plastiscines and Jaguar Love, North Star Bar, 2639 Poplar St., 215-787-0488, northstarbar.com.

by Molly Eichel

The androgynous facial features, the bleach-blond pixie haircut: Patrick Wolf looks like he's from another planet.

Little Joy

Fri., June 19, 9 p.m., $10, with Dead Trees, Fang Fang and Edison Proposal, Khyber, 56 S. Second St., 215-238-5888, thekhyber.com.

by Molly Eichel

The members of Little Joy take their moniker from an L.A. bar. It fits.

Pansy Division

Wed., June 24, 7 p.m., $12, with Percocettes and Sgt. Sass, The North Star Bar, 2639 Poplar St., northstarbar.com.

by John Vettese

In 1994, Pansy Division used their opening slot on a Green Day theater tour to smash barriers, satirize stereotypes and toss dildos around the stage.

Food

Smart Mouth

Bocca is well on its way to carving out its own small plates niche.

by David Snyder

Small plates are nothing new in Center City, but Bocca's have a unique look and feel.

Bardcore

Lovers and Madmen

by Trey Popp

Lovers and Madmen, which opened in March at 40th and Ludlow, has got me in a tizzy. There's a lot to love, but almost as much that drives me crazy.

What's Cooking

This Week in Eats

by Lauren Fleming

20th Annual Real Men Cook | Saison Beer Brunch at Johnny Brenda's | Sixth Annual Asian Festival | Crudo Wine Dinner at Positano Coast

Feeding Frenzy

Restaurants opening, closing and pending

by Drew Lazor

Smokin' Betty's | The Franklin Mortgage & Investment Co. | Panda Bar

Agenda

Agenda Lead:

Sin City

Cabaret Red Light has a very bad influence — the seven deadly deeds.

by Holly Otterbein

The most shocking part of Cabaret Red Light's Gluttony! involves bare breasts and a whole lot of liquid chocolate.

Last Chance

Catch it or Regret It

by Holly Otterbein

Gold Mountain | The Rose Tattoo | Houston and Bowery

Just Opened:

Pterodactyl

Classes begin the week of June 22, 6:30 p.m., $160-$190, 3237 Amber St., fifth floor, 215-501-7158, pterodactylphiladelphia.org.

by Sherri Hospedales

At Pterodactyl, you don't have to be Picasso to get creative. Heck, you don't even have to be a kinda OK art school student.

Comedy:

Nice Jewish Girls Gone Bad

Sun., June 21, 8 p.m., $13-$15, The Note, 142 E. Market St., West Chester, 484-947-5713, nicejewishgirlsgonebad.com.

by Lauren Fleming

We don't normally condone the type of ethnoreligious jokes that Nice Jewish Girls Gone Bad thrives on. But since they're being dished out by the very people who've been the punchline of the past, oh, 10,000 years or so, we'll make an exception.

Action/Adventure:

Kaiju Big Battel

Sat., June 20, 8 p.m., $18.50, Trocadero, 1003 Arch St., 215-922-LIVE, thetroc.com.

by Holly Otterbein

"The idea came about from monster tales, Japanese movies and Godzilla movies," says Noxious. "It's not quite wrestling or action-adventure. It's more like a rock concert and performance art combined."

Events/Festivals:

Summer Solstice '09

Sat.-Sun., June 20-21, 3 p.m.-dawn, $10, Kimmel Center, 260 S. Broad St., 215-790-5800, kimmelcenter.org.

by Chelsea Calhoun

Each year in late June, Mother Nature gives the northern hemisphere one day that's got a little more daylight than the rest in order to, in my humble opinion, party hard.

Wizard World

Fri., June 19, noon-7 p.m.; Sat., June 20, 10 a.m.-7 p.m.; Sun., June 21, 11 a.m.-5 p.m., $25-$50, Pennsylvania Convention Center, 1101 Arch St., wizardworld.com.

by Brion Shreffler

While Wizard World is definitely keen on pushing merchandise — you'll see many more wrestling action figures there as you will actual wrestlers.