The Bell Curve

City Paper's Quality-o-Life-o-Meter

-1 Democrats and Republicans debate the successes of Pennsylvania's subsidized jobs program that ends on Sept. 30. One thing they can agree on: Success isn't something you figure out by examining data. You have to debate it.

-3 After neglecting to pay a $3.3 million bond payment last month, Harrisburg considers bankruptcy. Not that you'd be able to tell the difference.

+1 A play written by local teens explores flash mobs. Scene One: Loot theater. Scene Two: There is no Scene Two.

-2 Two additional women claim that Philadelphia Housing Authority executive director Carl R. Greene sexually harassed them, but don't plan on filing complaints. "Sounds like these two ladies are horny for the Greene Monster," says Greene. "OK, now we're filing," they say. "I have a problem," says Greene.

0 Schools superintendent Arlene Ackerman vows to put the past behind her after dealing with three straight years of harsh criticism. "That's cute," say harsh critics.

+1 Phillies first baseman Ryan Howard will appear in the season finale of Entourage. And provide commentary for the collector's edition of Hack.

+3 Ryan Howard and Chase Utley will star in the upcoming season of It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia. In addition to their two-man Fringe Festival adaptation of Breaking Bad.

-3 Major League Baseball forces a local Flugtag team to remove the head of its Phanatic-shaped vehicle. "We can't have our officially licensed symbols associated with fast-paced entertainment."

-2 Another store closes on Antiques Row, further deteriorating the once-flourishing district. "I blame the bike lanes!" says Stu Bykofsky, who is priced to move in a storefront window at 10th and Pine.

This week's total: -1 | Last week's total: 10