The Bell Curve

CP's Quality-o-Life-o-Meter

[+4] Philadelphians boo as the small wrecking ball used to begin the demolition of the Spectrum bounces off. We are a complicated people.

[0] According to a new study, sandwich and takeout shops in Center City are being replaced by fancier restaurants at a rate of one per month since 2006. Let's do this, calculator-watch ... Heavens! That's like 48 fancy restaurants!

[+3] According to City Controller Alan Butkovitz, fewer Philadelphians are having their houses foreclosed on than other cities in the country. Philadelphia, home of the white-knuckled squatter.

[+1] Old City residents protest plans to build a new condo/hotel/restaurant complex at Fourth and Race. Which might explain this Craigslist posting: NEEDED: Historical artifact (dinosaur bone? remains of slave dwelling?) for use as construction delay tactic. Must be D/D free, BBW OK, NSA.

[-2] Police charge a Germantown man with burning down his girlfriend's Nicetown house after an argument. Police also declare the man the winner of that argument.

[0] Authorities close a part of Market Street after finding a tube containing blue liquid, later deemed to be harmless. "Our bad," says Tampax.

[+3] PGW announces reduced rates for the next three months. If we paid our gas bills, we'd be very happy about this news.

[+4] A proposed tax would target businesses outside the city, and reduce taxes for Philly businesses making less than $100,000. Also if you see somebody from the suburbs eating a sandwich you can ask for that sandwich and they have to give it to you.

[0] Friends throw a surprise party for Arlen Specter at Prime Rib. Then, with like 10 minutes left, Specter switches to a party in the next room because he heard there was free pudding.

[+1] Danny Bonaduce marries his girlfriend, who says she was a fan of his reality show. She also enjoys conversation, sunsets and long orange turds on the beach.