Confidence Game

Leah Macdonald's In My Body at Wexler Gallery

by John Vettese

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Published: Dec 15, 2010

Wexler Gallery

TOP TO BOTTOM: Sarah/Black Fan (detail), Open Hands, Comfort, Crow's Mask (detail); all photographs by Leah Macdonald.

Do you feel comfortable in your body?

This isn't a gender-exclusive question — I sure don't. Judging from the dour facial expressions on photographer Leah Macdonald's subjects, many of them don't, either — but not the ones you'd expect.

"In My Body" draws from two decades worth of female nude studies, with the central goal being the promotion of positive body image. Macdonald, a Philadelphia photographer, began photographing nudes as a college student in San Francisco after being involved in a motorcycle accident in the early '90s. She felt withdrawn, self-conscious, she says, so she placed an ad in a local weekly — "Wanted: women to model for fine art photographs who have evidence of LIFE, TRAUMA OR INJURY. Call Leah."

The response was enough to begin a project that eventually would fill numerous scrapbooks — women of all ages, all races, all sizes. Compiled into the "In My Body" exhibit, the work becomes a mirror of her subjects: older images as well as recent ones, wall-size canvases adjoining smaller prints on paper. Surrounded by her work at Wexler one recent afternoon, Macdonald recounts the obstacles it encountered over the years.

"Whenever I showed my photos early in my career, I always heard, 'Do people really want to see scars? Do they want to buy photos of people missing limbs?'" Gathering it under an umbrella like this, she says, gives the images context. It underscores the project's central theme that "beauty" is a social construct, and finding personal comfort and confidence is of greater importance than forcing one's physical appearance to meet some rigid, artificially prescribed standard.

In some regards, the project succeeds. Simply initiating the dialogue in a high-profile venue is an accomplishment in itself. But the series also prompts questions that seem counter to its goals.

For instance, on the larger works, Macdonald's method of encaustic painting on top of the silver gelatin image creates an uncomfortable, distressed feeling. The images are noisy and distorted, stained in rusty shades and splattered with stray inky dots. In Sarah/Black Fan, a young, blond-haired woman wears knee-high socks and a pouty expression, with little else evidently amiss beyond the frustrated scrapes of paint. Why is the technique used to force trauma, rather than celebrate her appearance?

Again with the faces: Many seem distant, sad, forlorn. A short tattooed woman is photographed against a concrete wall ( Pandora X, Pandora XX ), and she seems to be doing her very best to hide from the lens, even though she stands completely in the open. In the first image, Pandora looks at the camera with bewildered eyes; in the second, she's facing the wall with her back to the camera. Likewise, Heather — a woman whose head is shaved for reasons not revealed — seems pensive, as does Kandy. She strikes an angelic pose, with arms outstretched, but her focus is elsewhere.

Are these women truly self-confident, the feeling the show hopes to promote? They don't seem to be. Perhaps this is the point, showing the subjects' internal discomfort in their bodies — the encaustic technique reinforces a dream-like, introverted consciousness. On the other hand, their expressions could simply indicate a lack of connection between photographer and subject. The aesthetic is stunning, to be sure, but Macdonald admits that many subjects are strangers, and it shows.

Some seem bemused (Georgianna looks downward quizzically, at a skirt many sizes too big for her waist), some timid. More are simply poker-faced, and those whose expressions appear the least at ease are those whose bodies most closely approach the traditional standard of physical beauty. Perhaps that's saying something.

On the other hand, subjects appearing the most confident show the greatest evidence of "life, trauma or injury." Perhaps that's saying something, as well. In sharp, bold prints with a minimal encaustic overlay, we see a woman with a burn scar across her torso, a woman with a double mastectomy, a middle-aged woman with sagging breasts and a round stomach, all facing the camera with nary an ounce of fear or insecurity.

Of all the photographs, these do the most to advance the project's message of positive body image and self-confidence. It's a shame to see so many of them hidden on the other side of a horizontal wall, dividing the exhibit in half between the Wexler's back room and the world outside.

(j_vettese@citypaper.net)

In My Body | Through Dec. 31, Wexler Gallery, 201 N. Third St., 215-923-7030, wexlergallery.com

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