Momma Chucks received the first season of LOST from her favorite daughter on Mother’s Day; she’s totally hooked and has emailed me the following hilarious messages over the past eight days, in sequence:

July 2: OMG, I CAN’T BELIEVE that with my fear of flying you would make me watch that first half hour of Lost!!!!!!!!!! Flashbacks of the plane crash–my worst nightmare! OK, so I fast-forwarded through a few things, and I had to just listen (and not watch) while Kate was sewing Jack’s back up

July 2: What did Kate do, and what the heck’s up with the Asian couple?

July 3: Crap. Jack (I now think of as Charlie from Party of Five) was chasing his father through the jungle and he fell off a HUGE CLIFF. I’m scared, WHY AREN’T YOU HERE TO WATCH THIS WITH ME?????

July 7: OK, people keep dying and then NOT dying. Charlie was hanging from a tree, and then Jack pounds on him enough and he’s alive again. Shannon gets eaten by the hairy monster, but JK, that was all a hallucination. Um, WHAT?????????

July 8: This is SO cool. My nose hurts (from my glasses) cause I’ve been watching so long.

July 8: O – M – G. Claire’s in labor, and Boone’s all messed up, and I’m SO NERVOUS.

July 9: He’s going to amputate Boone’s leg, AAAAAAKKKKKKKKK……

I emailed her back something about watching out for stray polar bears, and she said, “Oh, real nice. Boone’s dead, and you’re making jokes.”

This just in from Janis:

Subject line: "This will blow you away!!!!"

Note from my dad’s friend, who sent this his way: "Scroll down and try this. It’ll drive you nuts."

Maybe staring deep into David Copperfield’s beautiful, beautiful eyes makes people lose their sense of logic, who knows. Read on if you dare!

In today’s inbox, along with a terrifying video on how to properly extinguish a grease fire, we find that Janis has sent a link to what appears to be some sort of Dutch e-commerce site with the simple instructions to
"Mouse over the blue cup or just wait a little while for the page to start itself."

Now we all know to be wary of Internet stuffs involving cups, but this one is totally SFW, people, a Rube Goldbergian shopping experience (and honestly, doesn’t Xmas shopping kind of feel like that) reminiscent of that Honda ad from way back when. Just mouse over the blue cup and let the fun happen.

 

I can see why tiny, tiny angel-babies sitting in teacups and flowers saying adorably naughty things would resonate with Rebecca. (Not really sure how the kissing war fits into this, but, whatever.)

Brian Howard’s not the only one who gets adorable pet forwards from his mom. Rebecca sez: "OK, you know I don’t usually send stuff like this, but I laughed so hard…too cute not to forward!!"

Top 10 Reasons Dogs Bite People:

This week Janis sends us THE CUTEST DOG IN THE WORLD.

Quoth the e-mail: 

TYPE IN a command and see what happens… sit, roll over, down, beg, stand, sing, dance, jump up,run,  shake, fetch, play dead etc. and…it’s also very cute if you type in a command that’s not recognized…!!

Make sure you type in ‘Kiss’ too, but do it last.

I’ve had absolutely no luck getting him to pee on the carpet, which is strange, as most dogs just seem to do that when I’m around.

For this week’s installment of e-mail forwards from my mom, Janis sends along these lovable images of wet cats, which have always reminded me of post-midnight-snack Gremlins. The captions need some work — perhaps more of an i can has cheezburger treatment — but man, pissed off, soaking wet cats. That’s the good stuff. 

My mom, Janis Howard, god bless her, likes to keep my inbox peppered with useful tidbits — how to eat healthier, how to not smoke healthier, how to invest smarter, how to get ahead in my career — and I love her for it.

But my mom, the owner of two adorable widdle shih-tzu puppies, also has a propensity to forward me and my sister doggie e-mails so patently ridiculous/treacly cute that they absolutely need to be shared with you, dear reader. So, without further ado, I present to you:

Dog Pack Attacks Gator In Florida

At times nature can be cruel, but there is also a raw beauty, and even a certain justice manifested within that cruelty. 

The alligator, one of the oldest and ultimate predators, normally considered the "apex predator", can still fall victim to implemented ‘team work’ strategy, made possible due to the tight knit social structure and "survival of the pack mentality" bred into the canines. 

See the remarkable photograph below courtesy of Nature Magazine. Note that the Alpha dog has a muzzle hold on the gator preventing it from breathing, while another dog has a hold on the tail to keep it from thrashing. The third   dog  attacks the soft underbelly of the gator. 

            Not for the 
            squeamish! (more…)