With apologies to Paul Slansky, and hopes for a better 2009, we give you City Paper's 2008 End-of-the-Year Philadelphia News Quiz. (Answers at the bottom of the page.)
1) True or False: Michael Nutter reneged on his campaign promise to declare a "crime emergency" on his first day in office.
2) What did Nutter present to members of City Council before proposing his first budget?
A) A letter asking them to take reform seriously
B) A letter promising to take their concerns to heart
C) Nothing. Why would he give them anything?
3) Philadelphia Inquirer editor Bill Marimow was lampooned on Season 5 of HBO's The Wire. Why did Marimow say he stopped watching the show in Season 1?
A) "Too close to home"
B) "Too Dickensian"
C) "Too picaresque"
4) In response to charges that he failed to pay his taxes, T. Milton Street argued that federal income taxes are unconstitutional. Who among the following had not made the same argument previously?
A) Actor Wesley Snipes
B) The Nuwaubians, a quasi-religious African-American sect
C) Eddie Ray Kahn, founder of Guiding Light of God Ministries
D) Phillies great Greg "The Bull" Luzinski
5) Why did Prof. John Street tell a class of students at Temple he abandoned plans to build a stadium in Chinatown?
A) A woman at a community meeting started crying, and Street was late to receive an award.
B) Chinatown was between City Hall and his home, and he didn't want to deal with the traffic.
C) "They had already been screwed with the Convention Center, so ..."
D) District Councilman Frank DiCicco started crying, and Street was late to receive an award.
6) Lagging in the polls, how did Hillary Clinton try to endear herself to Philadelphia voters before the April primary?
A) Declared herself a closet Phillies fan
B) Likened herself to Rocky Balboa
C) Said, "I know my cheesesteak comes Whiz wit"
D) Called Fishtown the "hardest-working neighborhood" in the city
7) After chanting "Doc is dead" at Larry Farnese's victory party, what was Vince Fumo's take on the political future of John Dougherty?
A) "I told you already: Doc is Dead."
B) "He'll be fine. He's an asshole, and assholes never die."
C) "As long as he stays in charge of that union, he'll have funds. ... And that's the way he has, quote, 'power.'"
D) "As long as he stays in charge of that union, he has friends. ... And that's the way he still, quote, 'matters.'"
8) Identify the correct progression of figures Mayor Nutter has quoted for the city's budget deficit:
A) $450 million, $650 million to $850 million, $1 billion
B) $200 million, $600 million, $400 million, $800 million
C) $450 million, $650 million to $850 million, $1 billion, $1.4 billion
D) Nutter has never quoted exact figures, instead saying simply, "It's bad."
9) Which factual error did Council aide Latrice Bryant make in responding to Fox 29's report on her faulty timesheets?
A) She claimed reporter Jeff Cole belonged to an all-white country club.
B) She claimed her compensation was not tied to the hours she works.
C) She claimed she was not contractually obligated to work over the summer.
D) She claimed she had never been to Jamaica.
10) Which of the following is not the headline of a column the Daily News' Christine Flowers wrote this election season?
A) I'm Immune to the Obama Swoon
B) An Obama-nation on Immigration
C) Sarah Palin, GOP Wonder Woman
D) Feminists' Biggest Nightmare: Stepford Sarah
E) America's First Socialist President
F) The Wrong Choice
G) "Hope" Obama Keeps His Word
11) How did the Phillies' rallying cry "Why Can't Us?" originate?
A) As an ironic T-shirt designed by an artist in Northern Liberties
B) Uttered by a caller named "Marty from Delaware" on a call-in radio show.
C) Charlie Manuel said it.
D) Brett Myers said it.
12) What did Alton "Ace Capone" Coles, who was convicted in March of being the head of a violent cocaine-dealing organization after making a movie, New Jack City: The Next Generation, depicting himself as a drug kingpin, say to Inquirer reporter George Anastasia when reached by phone in the Federal Detention Center?
A) "You wouldn't take Denzel Washington and indict him for being a drug dealer because he played one in American Gangster."
B) "I've never even been in the same room as cocaine."
C) "They got the wrong Ace Capone. I'm the fake one."
D) "Did you like the movie?"
13) Which local luminary was not listed as a potential witness in Vince Fumo's federal trial?
A) Gov. Ed Rendell
B) Radio host Jerry "the Geator" Blavat
C) Former City Paper Editor Howard Altman
D) Former Police Commissioner John Timoney
14) True or False: After announcing that he intends to close 11 city libraries, saying that we need to "right-size" the city, and refusing to budge in the face of staunch public opposition, Mayor Nutter's aid proposal to President-elect Obama included a request for $30 million for two new library branches.
Answer Key: 1) False. A crime emergency was declared, although emergency powers to limit crowds and set curfews have not been utilized. 2) D 3) C 4) D 5) A 6) B 7) C 8) A 9) C 10) E 11) B 12) A 13) C 14) True